Goin' Nowhere Fast
by ikilledkennyandjr
Summary: No other girl could almost kill my car and get away with it. Jordan confides in an old friend for what may be the last time. Oneshot, JordanAngela.


**DISCLAIMER (in the style of Jordan Catalano): The show belongs to, like, the Bedford Falls company, or whatever. I don't own anything but the, like, story thing. So, so, getting back to that fanfic... it's made up, right?**

**Rating: PG for one swear word.**

**Pairing: Jordan/Angela.**

**A/N: I always thought it was cute how Jordan had a soft spot for his car (and that he was a lucky bastard for such a nice one!) and wondered how he'd react to "Red's death". This was the product of many other J/A fics on the site and my recent fangirling over the guy. I hope I got his voice right.**

** ---**

You can't do this to me, Red. We've, like, been through too much, or whatever, for you to leave me now.

I remember when I first saw you, three years ago, at my uncle's garage. He'd built you for me--out of, like, nothing but spare parts. Funny how the guy's been there for me for my whole life when no one else in my family gives a damn. Anyway, he said he'd teach me to drive if I worked for him. It was, like, what do you call it? A win-win situation.

My first thought getting behind the wheel was, like... no thinking at all. Because it was so powerful and dangerous, like that thing Angela told me back when I called it quits with her. 'Cept she really meant sex, and I was too stupid to stay and work things out. Seems like it's always that way.

It's weird, isn't it? How you, like, practically started the whole deal with Angela. We had our first kiss in you, and then our third, which I guess was the first one she really... wanted, or whatever. She almost crashed you that one time, and I didn't care, 'cause she looked so cute doin' it. That scared me shitless, Red. No other girl could almost kill my car and get away with it. I guess maybe that's part of the reason I broke up with her, or whatever. It's like, she gets at me, y'know? Makes me better, like she's my... what's that thing? My conscience. Like I need her, or somethin'.

Like I need you. You could be gone soon. As I stand over you, tryin'a fix your beat-up engine, I think back to all the bits my folks were throwing stuff at each other and I had to duck out the back door, driving you down the block and crashing in the back seat. On those summer nights, you were warm and good to me like Angela Chase has always been. Well, almost always. Like in that song I wrote for you and played for her, you really are my shelter from the storm.

But not all of our times are good. That night at Louie's stands out the most when I think of you now, the parking lot and the booze and Rayanne Graff and the things I did with her in the backseat. In the same place I slept by myself, night after night, not even dreaming of stuff. But that time I dreamed of her--not Graff, but Angela. I wanted her, but I messed things up again, and I blamed you for it.

So after I got back together with Angela, we started havin' fights and I started being dumb again, wanting sex. Well, yesterday, we had our worst fight ever, one that seemed to take over me, and finally she said that she wanted out. I was so angry and scared, Red, scared that I'd tossed it all away, and I still am. I drove you to the nearest bar, real reckless as Brain would say--but we don't talk much any more, me an' him--and... I'm sorry, old girl. I messed up bad not to see the other car coming. Damn it, I coulda if I wasn't so mad at myself. Then I had to wait around for the cops, and the ambulance came--I wasn't hurt or nothin', but they took me in anyway. When all I really wanted to do was see if I could fix you. I wish you hadn't been smashed so bad. It was like you were trying to protect me by taking yourself.

I don't know if I can fix it, Red. The thing with you or the thing with Angela. And that's what's makin' me so... frustrated. It's like I just take for granted what I have until I don't have it any more. Then I see how great it was all that time. What happened at Louie's wasn't your fault, nah. You're just a car. And what happened with Angela was all my fault, every bit of it.

What I don't get is, why d'ya have to leave me right now? I need to drive you somewhere quiet and just lie on your hood 'til I can think again. Because... I think I might love her, Red.

Or whatever.

---

**So there you have it. Just a little oneshot, kinda sucked but oh well. It's hard to write flowery from Jordan's point of view. Reviews/concrit would be wonderful, and I could use some reviews for my other MSCL fic too, since it's my baby and much more nuanced than this. Anyways... remember to keep on writing, ya crazy kids!**

**  
--Kenny**


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